Civil Eats » April Fool’s

Monsanto Discontinues MON810, CEO has Change of Heart on How to Feed the World

Civil Eats — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 14:08:50 +0000

In an astounding move, Monsanto announced this morning that it would be discontinuing production in 2011 of the genetically modified corn seed, MON 810, currently planted on millions of acres in the US, as evidence in a recent study indicated that the digestive organs of rats who ate the grain were disintegrating.

“We just felt we needed to do the right thing,” said Monsanto CEO Hugh Grant in a statement. “If our products are doing more harm than good, we thought perhaps we should change our tact for feeding the world.”

Grant continued, “We’ve been hearing a lot about local solutions. The role of diverse planting for preventing pests, paving roads so farmers can get to market, organizations working with subsistence farmers to build soil that can withstand drought locally, that kind of thing. Farmers need to focus on soil health, and we want to be a part of that solution.”

As a result of Monsanto’s new-found commitment, they are donating all the projected $5.1 billion in profits on seeds and traits for 2010 to these local, farmer solution-based efforts.

FDA announces new “Focus on the Positive” Campaign

afernald — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 00:04:50 +0000

Newly appointed Food and Drug Administration chief Joshua Sharfstein announced this afternoon that in the wake of this week’s pistachio scandal, the agency would launch a new Safest Food Awareness Bureau in early 2010. “We live in such a ‘bad news’ world,” said Sharfstein, “this new approach will focus on the positive news.” Instead of announcing when food is contaminated, the new agency will be tasked with issuing a daily announcement of non-contaminated American foods, slowly phasing out the current policy of announcing food recalls directly to the public.

“This new program addresses the issue of an upswing in the number of food safety challenges, a shift that we do not see swinging back down in the next few decades,” Sharfstein stated at today’s press conference. This may be good news for consumers – instead of focusing on the increasing number of things we cannot eat, we can celebrate the few things we can. Sharfstein announced that the FDA will begin a 9-month shift towards the new approach this month, with a campaign entitled “Focus on the Positive.” Under the new guidelines, announcements about food contamination will be “focused on proactive statements, for example: ‘Try eating almonds and lettuce today, but stay away from spinach’”, said Sharfstein. The new agency plans on announcing its interim commissioner at the end of May 2009.

“Ripe Food” Movement Takes Hold in Berkeley

afrench — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 21:16:46 +0000

In a groundbreaking review by Cassie Harwood, “From the Compost Bin to the Dinner Table: Second Life Cafe leads the way in the “ripe food” movement.,” she describes what can only be described as the next wave of responsible eating.

According to Harwood:

“Second Life, a lunch and dinner restaurant that opened in March, caters to the quickly bourgeoning “ripe food” movement. Unlike raw food, which has seen a spike in popularity in recent years and is heralded for its fresh, uncooked status, ripe food has the distinction of being recycled — or, to be more accurate, composted.”

This seems like the most sustainable idea I’ve heard all day.

Alice Waters Launches Frozen Line

afernald — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 08:26:51 +0000

Alice Waters’ office today confirmed reports that the doyenne of sustainable food has partnered with Dean and Deluca on a new line of frozen foods that, in a statement released to the press today, her office described as “a crossover product making sustainability accessible to a wider audience”. The “Simple Perfection” entrees, which consist of a oven-ready terra-cotta plate rubbed with garlic and sprinkled with salt are designed to be laden with seasonal vegetables by the user.

The small bottle of olive oil included in each entrée can be used to dress the raw salad or to prepare your own seasonal vegetables for the oven. Planned for a May ’09 release, the harissa-rubbed bazaar entrée and evocative finocchio, which will be scented with burnt fennel pollen, will widen the line. A descriptive brochure included in each package describes suitable ways of procuring food for the entrees, including farmers’ markets, foraging, and growing or killing animals yourself. Asked why the entrees were frozen given that they consist mostly of a few condiments, Ms. Waters’ office stated “the vision was to fully replicate the simple convenience of frozen food – down to the last detail.” Priced at $19.99 per entree.

New Food Security and Sustainability Stimulus (FSASS) Announced

afrench — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 08:04:00 +0000

“Now that we have planted a White House garden, we want to pay all American’s to do the same,” announced President Obama in one of the boldest policy shifts of his administration so far.
“This is not strictly a food issue,” he continued, “but it is a security issue and an energy issue that affects American’s from all backgrounds and races, in all fifty states. Access to clean, healthy, sustainable food has to be one of our top priorities going forward.”

Obama continued by outlining the new Food Security and Sustainability Stimulus (FSASS) with the revolutionary goal of paying the population to get involved with their food. A variety of specific initiatives include an increase in funding for urban farming initiatives, a joint USDA – Homeland Security program on “farm-worker health, safety, and well being,” and progressive tax credits for turning your backyard lawn (or apartment rooftop) into a source of food for your family.

Obama said he expected the FSASS to pass through both the House and Senate with little opposition.

Photo: marcn

Food Fight! Brawl Erupts Outside Alembic Bar (SF)

afernald — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 06:35:19 +0000

Noted Bay Area chef Niko Manetto was celebrating his return from Croatia on Saturday night (3/28) at Dave McLean’s San Francisco hotspot Alembic when a brawl erupted that left him and three others in the emergency room. Mr. Manetto was showing a ziplock bag of seeds of the rare broccolucciolini variety of bitter herbs he had found while trekking in the remote Croatian highlands to a group of friends with him at the bar, when one made a grab for it, a brawl erupted. One of the hospitalized chefs – who preferred to remain anonymous – stated “Croatia is totally the next Italy, when we saw those bitter herb seeds we all had menu descriptions dancing before our eyes and totally went crazy.” The seeds themselves appear to have been lost in the kerfuffle.

NRA Reaches out to “Foodie” Community with Gag Gadget

afernald — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 06:20:30 +0000

The National Rifle Association today announced a surprising new membership proposal to reach out to food lovers who might become gun lovers with a little convincing. NRA spokesman Bart Barnaby stated “food lovers and gun lovers have a ton of things in common, maybe for the food lover it’s seeking out that crazy fish you kind of know you’re not supposed to eat, while for the gun lover it’s killing that animal that might be considered kind of borderline endangered.”

The NRA developed a functional-and-funny gag “gun” that grinds meat and looks really great stuffed into the pocket of an apron. The “guns” are not for sale, but are a giveaway for any new NRA members (an annual membership costs $35) who can demonstrate that they are professionals in the culinary field. Reportedly, a deal with celebrity chef Chris Cosentino is in the works, a natural partner according to Mr. Barnaby, who said “Think about chefs with all their knives – I’m just struck by the parallels between gun rack displays and those neat roll-up knife carryalls. There are so many identical things among the foodies and the gun lovers that this partnership is a no-brainer.” For more information, visit the NRA website.