Civil Eats

In an astounding move, Monsanto announced this morning that it would be discontinuing production in 2011 of the genetically modified corn seed, MON 810, currently planted on millions of acres in the US, as evidence in a recent study indicated that the digestive organs of rats who ate the grain were disintegrating.

“We just felt we needed to do the right thing,” said Monsanto CEO Hugh Grant in a statement. “If our products are doing more harm than good, we thought perhaps we should change our tact for feeding the world.”

Grant continued, “We’ve been hearing a lot about local solutions. The role of diverse planting for preventing pests, paving roads so farmers can get to market, organizations working with subsistence farmers to build soil that can withstand drought locally, that kind of thing. Farmers need to focus on soil health, and we want to be a part of that solution.”

As a result of Monsanto’s new-found commitment, they are donating all the projected $5.1 billion in profits on seeds and traits for 2010 to these local, farmer solution-based efforts.

Newly appointed Food and Drug Administration chief Joshua Sharfstein announced this afternoon that in the wake of this week’s pistachio scandal, the agency would launch a new Safest Food Awareness Bureau in early 2010. “We live in such a ‘bad news’ world,” said Sharfstein, “this new approach will focus on the positive news.” Instead of announcing when food is contaminated, the new agency will be tasked with issuing a daily announcement of non-contaminated American foods, slowly phasing out the current policy of announcing food recalls directly to the public. Read More

In a groundbreaking review by Cassie Harwood, “From the Compost Bin to the Dinner Table: Second Life Cafe leads the way in the “ripe food” movement.,” she describes what can only be described as the next wave of responsible eating. Read More

Alice Waters’ office today confirmed reports that the doyenne of sustainable food has partnered with Dean and Deluca on a new line of frozen foods that, in a statement released to the press today, her office described as “a crossover product making sustainability accessible to a wider audience”. The “Simple Perfection” entrees, which consist of a oven-ready terra-cotta plate rubbed with garlic and sprinkled with salt are designed to be laden with seasonal vegetables by the user. Read More

“Now that we have planted a White House garden, we want to pay all American’s to do the same,” announced President Obama in one of the boldest policy shifts of his administration so far.
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Noted Bay Area chef Niko Manetto was celebrating his return from Croatia on Saturday night (3/28) at Dave McLean’s San Francisco hotspot Alembic when a brawl erupted that left him and three others in the emergency room. Mr. Manetto was showing a ziplock bag of seeds of the rare broccolucciolini variety of bitter herbs he had found while trekking in the remote Croatian highlands to a group of friends with him at the bar, when one made a grab for it, a brawl erupted. One of the hospitalized chefs – who preferred to remain anonymous – stated “Croatia is totally the next Italy, when we saw those bitter herb seeds we all had menu descriptions dancing before our eyes and totally went crazy.” The seeds themselves appear to have been lost in the kerfuffle.

The National Rifle Association today announced a surprising new membership proposal to reach out to food lovers who might become gun lovers with a little convincing. NRA spokesman Bart Barnaby stated “food lovers and gun lovers have a ton of things in common, maybe for the food lover it’s seeking out that crazy fish you kind of know you’re not supposed to eat, while for the gun lover it’s killing that animal that might be considered kind of borderline endangered.” Read More